I listened to John Piper the other day preach on the topic of killing sin. you know when you listen to a sermon and feel like it's being preached just. for. you.? well that sermon was just. for. me. UGH, why is it so hard to put to death the things of the flesh? there's nothing admirable about sin. nothing. yet there comes the days, I stand on wobbly feet, one planted in the boat of flesh and desires, the other in His unfailing word and often times I still choose to jump on the wrong side. I guess this only proves that life is no picnic. the war rages on.
I keep fooling myself into thinking that standing around temptation is just a way to prove that I'm strong and that I can handle it. in all honesty, it just makes me stumble every single time and I'm left only with a tremendous amount of guilt. I've learned that when temptation comes around the corner, just run. it's a funny thing because most people don't like running away from stuff as there is this unspoken mentality in this day and age of "you're a weakling if you run!" and I all have to say to that is uhm, hello. this is sin. it will kill you. don't play with it. if you saw a blazing fire with flames that licked seven feet high, would you actually say "oh! I can't run from this fire, because it'll make me look like a weakling"? I don't think so. and if you did, you would be a fool. in the same way, playing with temptation is folly. get out while you can.
Piper also highlighted on the importance of being active in the Christian life. how can people tell if you're a Christ-follower? the answer was quite striking:
by.
your.
fruit.
you can talk all you like about being the Christian you are, and you can beg God for change, but if you don't take action, if you don't actively spot your sin and put it to death and instead just sit back and expect something to happen?
you're not a Christian.
nope.
I couldn't agree more. and all this begs the question: can people call me a Christ-follower? when they see me do they see God? am I bearing fruit or am I just another one of those people with a label that screams 'HYPOCRITE'?
I used to struggle in whatever nonsense (and by whatever nonsense, I mean exactly that) but the more I struggled with it, the more tangled I got. you see, there's something to hating sin... it comes naturally when you decide that you want to pursue holiness. it's like this. whatever you treasure or value (actually I use those words quite loosely here). scratch that. whatever you love/pursue automatically puts this object/passion, whatever it may be, on a pedestal in your mind. (e.g. you're crazy about losing weight and so you place it on a pedestal in your mind and whatever you do, you strive to keep that priority high. or. you're addicted to porn, so you place it on the pedestal and you revolve in a cycle of lust). makes sense right? but when you put holiness on that pedestal, maan. everything else? just doesn't measure up anymore.
it's strangely a pleasant feeling though when you start realizing just how much you hate your flesh. sounds weird, right? but I suppose it's the only natural thing when you're priorities have been flipped right. God and the world. can't have both. jump on the right side and hating your flesh is suddenly second nature. I'm not saying it'll happen right away, after all it's taken me seventeen years to only begin realizing what this all truly means, but when it does, it'll be for the better. and believe me, it doesn't end there. you'll wake up each morning, sometimes on the wrong side and sometimes on the right side, but the battle will continue regardless. press on and don't lose heart.
you know I don't like talking about spiritual things on my blog and it's not because "omg. she's being so judgmental to the non-believers" ha. God, no. I could care less because they've far missed the point if they jump to that conclusion. so why then? because firstly, whenever I stumble onto some person's blog that I find amazing, I feel like I'm reading something I'm not supposed to because of how personal it is. yeah, I'm sorry if you feel that you shouldn't be here reading whatever I post, but let me say this now: I don't care. if I wanted/needed to keep something private about my life, it wouldn't be on the internet--not on a status, not on a tweet, not on Facebook, and certainly not on my blog. whoever you are, wherever you are, you're welcome here and I hope you don't feel that you're intruding. that being said, talking about my own spiritual growth is highly personal but it's something that I feel a lot of people struggle with and if whatever ramblings I post about it can actually help another, then that's great. but most importantly, if people can walk away from this knowing there's one more person that's going through the same thing they are then that's all that matters to me.
and then there's the other reason I don't talk about my spiritual growth. somewhere, somehow, someone will read this and think, "who the heck are you to say all that? you think you're so much better than everybody else, huh?" I get it. I do. but I've said this before and I'll definitely be saying it some more: this is not me boasting about anything. at all. it's rather like what Paul talks about in the Bible, I talk about these things not to boast but in the contrary, to show Christ's power through my weaknesses, so yes, I may boast all the more. but not in me, in Him.
well, that's enough to chew on, don't you think? my mind is reeling from the truckload of schoolwork ahead, so I really must run. best of luck to everybody&their studies! have a swell week and see you around.
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